A Taste of Blackberries

The narrator refuses to eat, skipping both lunch and dinner that day. That night, he sinks into the bathtub, declining his parents’ offer to take him to the funeral parlor with them. He watches the ripples in the tub and considers how they bounce off the side and return. He thinks, “[A]s long as I acted like he wasn’t dead, he wouldn’t be dead” (45). His parents knock on the door to let him know they’re about to leave. Suddenly, the narrator changes his mind and decides to go with them after all.

At the funeral parlor, people are gathered, speaking in hushed tones. This is only the second time the narrator has seen a dead body. The first time was when his Uncle Jonah died, and he remembers how they tried to make it look as if he were sleeping. The narrator makes his way through the crowd to see Jamie in the casket. As he looks at his friend, he becomes overwhelmed at the thought that Jamie will never wake up and rushes out of the funeral parlor. He finds a flower and angrily begins ripping it up. His dad finds him outside, and the narrator buries his face in his dad’s suit.

The narrator’s mom tries to talk to him about everything that night before bed, but he isn’t ready to talk. She checks on him later that night, but he pretends to be asleep. After she leaves for the second time, the narrator gets up and goes to the window, and he sees his mother crossing the yard to Jamie’s house. At that moment, for the first time since Jamie died, the narrator breaks down crying.

Suddenly, he wishes his mom was back with him so that she could comfort him. The door opens, and the narrator’s dad enters, scooping him up in his arms. The narrator thinks, “Funny, I hadn’t thought of Dad’s lap, but it was just as good. I cried and cried and cried” (54). His dad holds him, making sure the narrator knows he isn’t alone in his grief.

Jamie’s funeral is the next day. His parents are filling the time before the funeral with work and cleaning, and the neighborhood kids are out playing, “but in hushed tones, because of Jamie” (55). The narrator isn’t in the mood to be around any of them this morning. He looks over at Mrs. Mullins’s garden: “Right now I wanted to be there more than anything. It was the most private place I knew” (56). Mrs. Mullins doesn’t seem to be around, so the narrator sneaks into the garden alone.

The garden is filled with beautiful flowers of every color. Surrounded by nature, the narrator sits on one of the stones and reflects on Jamie’s death. He hears approaching footsteps, and Mrs. Mullins appears. She sits on another stone and softly greets him. The narrator asks Mrs. Mullins why Jamie had to die, and she tells him it’s a question that doesn’t have an answer. He then asks what happens after someone dies, but her answer is the same: “You just don’t know until you find out yourself, and apparently you can’t come back and tell what you found out” (62). The narrator stays in the garden until his mother calls him to come inside for lunch.

At the table, the narrator doesn’t touch his food. His stomach is growling, but even though “it [doesn’t] make much sense, [he] kn[ows] [he can’t] eat until after the funeral” (64). He can’t act as if everything is normal when his best friend is gone.