Beautiful Graves

In the novel, grief is portrayed as a multifaceted and complex experience, and its nuanced exploration of this issue focuses on the various ways in which the emotional weight of loss changes people, isolating them and eventually guiding them toward finding new paths in life. One of the most powerful aspects of grief depicted in the novel is its tendency to estrange people from their previous relationships. For example, Ever reflects on how her father, after the loss of her mother, now treats her like a client, “all businesslike and formal” (61). Their physical distance—with Ever in Massachusetts and her father and brother in California—further highlights the emotional distance in their family following her mother’s death. Ever’s longing for simpler times, such as “lazy Sunday afternoons with [Renn], playing Halo and arguing about meaningless things” (63), exemplifies the fact that grief doesn’t just strip away a loved one; it also robs people of the small, everyday joys that once defined their relationships.

Grief also manifests as a sense of numbness and stagnation. After losing Dom, Ever’s emotions become a confusing mix of anger and despair, as evidenced when she states, “I wonder how many losses one person can experience before they give up on the idea of happiness. […] Happiness seems like a mythical thing right now” (209). This passage reflects the crushing weight of cumulative grief and the hopelessness that can accompany it. After losing both her mother and Dom, Ever begins to see everything as insurmountable.

However, as time passes, there is a gradual shift from anger to acceptance. Ever reflects on the absence of closure, acknowledging that she will never fully understand Dom’s actions regarding her and Sarah. At this point in the novel, Ever comes to understand that grief isn’t an insurmountable force; instead, it is a painful but necessary part of life.

Ever’s father provides an even more powerful example of grief’s ability to change people’s actions. Although Ever’s love story is only just beginning, her father has already walked the full path of grief and recovery, as after losing his wife, he was brave enough to find new love. His experiences exemplify how the death of a spouse deeply affects the living partner. Despite his deep pain, he has slowly moved on after five years of grieving. He finds solace in his family, and while he recognizes that grief has changed him, he comes to realize that his family, and particularly his children, are worth fighting for. As he tells Ever, “That war Renn and I were fighting? We won. We are still a family. We laugh. We go places. […] We tell inside jokes. All we needed was for you to come back to us. And now that you have, everything will be okay” (246). His ability to meet a new woman, Donna, and fall in love again also illustrates that it is possible to move on from such a pivotal loss. Thus, the struggles of the various characters demonstrate that grief’s nonlinear path involves moments of anger, confusion, numbness, and a multitude of other complex emotions, but eventually, with time, people can begin to accept the loss and find new ways to fully embrace their lives.