53 pages • 1 hour read
Makiko stays out late, worrying Natsu and Midoriko. At midnight, she finally shows up, disheveled and heavily intoxicated. She lashes out at Midoriko, demanding to know how long she plans to keep up her silence and grabbing her by the elbow. Midoriko slaps her mother across the face, then walks into the kitchen, opens one of the egg cartons, and begins cracking eggs over her head. Sobbing, she breaks her silence by asking, “Why was I born?” (139). Makiko cracks several eggs over her own head, then takes Midoriko into her arms. She tells her that not everything in life has an answer.
The following day, Natsu takes Makiko and Midoriko to the train station. She asks Midoriko if she wants to stay in Osaka, but Midoriko chooses to leave with her mother. They agree to meet again soon.
Returning home, Natsu falls asleep. She dreams that she is back on the train, sitting across from a woman who is “[not] old, but not that young either” (145). She recognizes the woman as herself from several days ago, on the way to pick up Makiko and Midoriko. Natsu thinks that this version of her looks like Komi. Next, her father gets on the train. As the train fills up, he puts the other Natsu on his shoulders and exits the car. He carries other-Natsu on his shoulders to the Ferris wheel, and they ride up together.
Nine years have passed since the events of Breasts. In the intervening time, Natsu has achieved success in writing. After one of her short stories was selected for a prestigious prize, her debut book, a collection of short stories, became an unlikely bestseller. Her second novel was picked up by an editor named Ryoko Sengawa. Natsu now earns a living from writing—a combination of royalties and other gigs, including a column for a local magazine.
Natsu meets with several of her old coworkers for lunch. One of the women, Aya, asks the others what they would do if their husband needed a kidney. Natsu finds herself unable to relate to the question; most of the other women have husbands and children.
After lunch, Natsu meets up with Sengawa. They discuss the importance of securing a readership for Natsu, as well as their shared Osakan heritage. Like Natsu, Sengawa is unmarried and has no children. When Sengawa asks how the novel is going, Natsu dodges the question.
Natsu returns home to her new apartment, a slightly more upscale place in the Sangenjaya neighborhood. She reflects on the changes in her life. Though she’s grateful, she still feels unfulfilled. Natsu returns to a poem she wrote six months ago while intoxicated, which expresses her desire to have a baby. Considering the challenges of becoming a single mother by choice, Natsu tries to convince herself that she’s happy on her own.
Makiko calls Natsu to congratulate her on paying off her student loans in full. Makiko is now 48 and still works at Chanel. Midoriko is 20 and attending college in Kyoto, dating a man named Haruyama. Looking at a picture of Midoriko and her boyfriend, Natsu recalls her own romance with a man named Naruse, whom she dated for several years in her early 20s. Though she loved Naruse, sex with him was miserable and traumatic for Natsu because she didn’t have “the appetite” for physical intimacy. Their relationship ended when she discovered that Naruse was cheating on her with another woman. Naruse has since married and had a child.
Natsu contemplates the possibility of having a baby without having sex. All the options available are geared toward married couples, not single women. Flipping on the TV, Natsu stumbles across a special report on single women utilizing sperm banks to have children. One of the anonymous interviewees describes the sense of fulfillment she felt when holding her baby for the first time. After the report concludes, Natsu spends hours on her computer, researching.
In Chapter 7, Midoriko and Makiko reach a moment of catharsis—Midoriko breaks the silence and tension between them while breaking eggs over her head. These eggs are a physical representation of the ova Midoriko discusses in her journal entries. By breaking them, she symbolically expresses her desire to destroy the parts of her body that make her capable of childbirth. Midoriko asks her mother, “Why does everything change? Why was I born?” (139). Notably, Makiko doesn’t have answers for her daughter, suggesting that life is a confusing, often painful mess, and that having a child means exposing them to that mess without their consent.
In Eggs, which takes place nine years after Breasts, Natsu is financially solvent due to the success of her books. Despite her new career as a full-time writer, Natsu feels that her life has barely changed in the intervening years. The way nine years have seemingly slipped between her fingers highlights how alienated she feels from much of society. Despite her improved financial standing, Natsu feels much the same as she did in Breasts.
So far, Natsu has not displayed any strong desires, seeming content to let the material world pass her by. This lack of desire makes her sudden, strong urge to have a baby striking. It is a traditionally female urge that seems to contrast with her earlier resistance to gender norms. She desires a portion of the traditional female experience but does not want to participate in the conventional rituals of sex or marriage. When thinking of love and motherhood, Natsu has long told herself that “these things will never happen, not for me” (165). She feels like she doesn’t deserve these things because she deviates from the norm.
The lunch at which Natsu’s former co-workers discuss their husbands and children highlights how alienating it can be to live outside of gendered norms. These women once worked to support themselves like Natsu, but after getting married, all of them have become homemakers. Natsu can’t participate in their conversation because she doesn’t share the common experience of marriage and motherhood. However, Kawakami doesn’t frame Natsu’s unmarried status as negative. Most of Natsu’s friends complain about their husbands, with one lamenting the “miserable life” she leads. Yet none of them will consider divorce due to the stigmatization of single mothers.
By contrast, Sengawa, Natsu’s editor, seems content with her single and childless life. She has forged a path for herself as a successful and respected editor. Sengawa offers Natsu an alternative vision of what a happy and fulfilling life can look like for a woman, illuminating the theme of Defining Womanhood: Gender Roles in Contemporary Japan.
In Chapter 9, Natsu once again delves into the past, recalling her failed relationship with Naruse. Her memories reveal that she was once poised on the edge of a more conventional, domestic life, but was unable to continue on that path because of her inability to enjoy sex. Natsu’s asexuality is yet another way in which she fails to live up to gender norms and is punished for it. Unable to conceive through traditional means, Natsu must consider sperm donation, but Japan’s sperm donation system only caters to heterosexual, two-parent households. Kawakami showcases how living outside of gendered norms can have real, life-altering consequences for women. Living alone spares Natsu the trials of domestic life, but it leaves her with hardly any social power. Through this tradeoff, Kawakami gets at the theme of Single-Mother Households and the Dangers of Domesticity, honestly reckoning with the benefits and drawbacks of going against convention in a heteronormative, patriarchal society.
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