88 pages • 2 hours read
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Maya has trouble adjusting to her new all-girls school in San Francisco, where “the young ladies were faster, brasher, meaner and more prejudiced than any [she] had met at Lafayette County Training School” (214). Soon Maya is transferred to the well-regarded George Washington High School, where she is one of three Black students. It is located in the white residential area of San Francisco, and Maya loathes having to go through the neighborhood with its “neat streets, smooth lawns, white houses and rich children” (215).
Soon Maya realizes that she is not the most brilliant student at the school, and this feeling is new to her since she is used to being the smartest among her peers. Maya can't get along with other students, but she develops warm relationships with one of the teachers, Miss Kirwin. "Stimulating instead of intimidating" (216), the teacher treats Maya the same as other students, seemingly not noticing that she is Black. At fourteen, Maya receives a scholarship to the California Labor School, where she attends drama and dance classes in the evenings. The girl strives to become a graceful dancer like her mother, and the classes help her shed her shyness.
In San Francisco, Maya, Bailey, Mother, and Daddy Clidell live in a fourteen-room house, which they share with other roomers. Because of this, Maya has a chance to interact with a wide range of people, from shipyard workers to restaurant owners. At first, she doesn't pay much attention to Daddy Clidell, treating him as "one more faceless name added to Mother's roster of conquests" (219). But as she gets to know him better, his honest manner and directness appeal to her, and the two develop a warm relationship. While Mother teaches Maya how to behave in social situations, Daddy Clidell teaches her how to play poker, and introduces her to con men, so she can learn their tricks. After finding out that Daddy Clidell managed to become a successful businessman even without any formal education, Maya begins to appreciate his humility and entrepreneurial streak.
As Maya grows older, she sees that such things as breaking the law are interpreted differently depending on the race of the person who commits the crime. She also feels that since Black people had to endure oppression and prejudice for so long, their misbehavior sometimes can be tolerated and justified because “life demands a balance” (225).
Bailey Senior offers Maya the chance to spend her summer vacation with him in Southern California, and she happily agrees. Because of her father's air of pomposity, Maya imagines that he lives in a magnificent mansion and becomes disappointed when she arrives at his house, located "in a trailer park on the outskirts of a town that was itself the outskirts of town" (227). Maya meets her father's girlfriend, a small, young woman named Dolores. She keeps the house they share with Bailey Senior "clean with the orderliness of a coffin" (227), and Maya finds it difficult to live up to the woman's standards.
Working in the kitchen of a naval hospital, Bailey Senior enjoys cooking and often prepares elaborate dishes at home for Maya and Dolores. He often drives across the border to Mexico to buy ingredients for his meals, but Maya notices that they are readily available at local stores and suspects that there might be other reasons for his frequent visits.
Planning yet another trip, Bailey Senior invites Maya to come with him but doesn't extend the invitation to Dolores, which angers her. Maya is thrilled to have a chance to practice her Spanish and readily agrees. As they cross the border, Bailey Senior shares his bottle of liquor with the border guard in his kiosk while Maya waits for him in the car. Her father speaks Spanish fluently and is soon on friendly terms with the guard. He asks if the man would like to marry his fifteen-year-old daughter, gesturing towards Maya, and the guard replies that they would have many babies.
Having crossed the border, Maya and Bailey Senior drive up a dangerous mountain road, heading for the town of Ensenada. They stop about five miles away from the town at a local cantina, where everyone seems to know Bailey Senior very well. As he interacts with the locals and drinks at the bar, he appears to be "the hero of the hour" (232), and Maya notices an entirely different side of her father. She sees him as a lonely man who felt out of place wherever he was and detects an ever-present mismatch between his aspirations and social standing. In the cantina, on the other hand, he is respected and admired, and he enjoys himself greatly, drinking and dancing.
Maya, too, joins the dancing, but after some time, she notices that her father is gone. For a moment, she's afraid that he had left her, but she is relieved to see their car still parked outside. Maya assumes that her father is with another woman, and after some time, he comes back, highly intoxicated, and falls asleep on the back seat. Maya doesn't want to spend the night in the car in Mexico, so even though she doesn't know how to drive, she gets behind the wheel intending to drive them back to California. In complete darkness, Maya manages to maneuver the car down the mountain road, and it makes her feel empowered. However, at the border crossing, she hits another car, and because her Spanish is lacking, she can't communicate well with the guard and the family in the other vehicle. Her father finally wakes up and, using all his charm and fluent Spanish, resolves the situation and drives Maya back to his house.
As Maya adjusts to her new life in San Francisco, her quest for self-identity continues. Soon after starting to attend George Washington High School, Maya realizes that the old set of characteristics with which she used to describe herself, such as extraordinary, smart, and quick-witted, might no longer set her apart from her peers. Back in Stamps, Maya and Bailey stood out among other children because of their love for books and intelligence, but as they move to San Francisco, they notice that many of the city children are smarter and more advanced in their studies than they are. Nevertheless, Maya perseveres and continues to work toward receiving a good education and further fosters her love for books.
Maya's decision to attend art classes in the evening suggests that she is not only hard-working and studious but also artistically gifted. After accepting the scholarship to study drama and dance, Maya not only strives to overcome her clumsiness and become more graceful, but she also wants to satisfy her interest in the world of arts. Studying at the Labor school lays the foundation for unlocking her artistic potential, which, later in her life, will manifest itself in many forms of expression.
Bailey, Mother, Daddy Clidell, and Mother become Maya's world, and in their company, she feels loved and safe. She nevertheless stays in touch with her father, and when Maya travels to southern California to spend summer with Bailey Senior, the trip becomes another instance of her fantasies colliding with reality. Prior to the visit, Maya never had a chance to get to know her father well, but she had plenty of time to imagine the man he was. Known for her vivid imagination, Maya painted a picture of him that turned out to be quite different from reality. She expects him to live in a lavish mansion, not in a trailer park, and she is surprised to see that his girlfriend is hardly the glamorous lady she imagined her to be.
Maya realizes that her father has never belonged in Stamps or his own Johnson family, and all this time has been "a lonely person, searching relentlessly in bottles, under women's skirts, in church work and lofty job titles for his 'personal niche'" (233). This revelation makes her see how her father's sense of displacement mirrors her own and how the father and daughter might have more in common than she had previously thought.
Maya's decision to drive her intoxicated father back to California even though she has never sat behind the wheel before testifies to her growing sense of self-confidence. As she drives up the mountain road at night, Maya feels as if she is "controlling Mexico, and might and aloneness and inexperienced youth and Bailey Johnson, Sr., and death and insecurity, and even gravity" (239). After years of searching for her sense of self-worth, Maya finally feels empowered and entirely in control of her life, even if only for a fleeting moment. The freedom and strength she experiences while driving through the Mexican wilderness shatter as soon as they approach civilization and Maya gets into the accident. Thus, her fantasies collide with reality once again, leaving her disappointed and distressed.
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